Everything emanates from a central core of reality. If I really want to do something, and have given my all to its attainment, then I instinctively know without thinking that it is coming from my heart. In this manner, I am stable and calm in all matters. There is nothing that can easily shake my foundation. If I know what I want, I will eventually get it, such as my 1953 Mercedes that I spoke about earlier; such as the right person to share my life; such as increased success in my business. Anything! Technically, five individual approaches can be described as direct, upper, lower, left, and right. The philosophical implication is easy to understand and apply to every situation you are ever involved with.
The best way, as described above, is straight in to the center of the situation, or as Musashi would say, the target. The target being your objective and anything that would stand in your way of attaining it. Regardless of the type of approach you use, you must be prepared to immediately go in with a closing gesture. If you do not, then you are only playing at warding off objections to your goal and will have to continuously keep blocking or defending. Constant defending wears you down at the same time it strengthens the opponent. You are not in a fight to the death, but you are still in a situation where it must be resolved one way or another, in your favor or not. When you are in this type of situation, then you might as well get what you came for, which can also be defeat if you are not prepared body and soul to take what you deem is yours.
The second method would appear as an upper approach. This is where you are appealing to the higher intellect of the situation that must be resolved. If you can do this reasonably, then all power to you. Unfortunately, when dealing with most men, and because of their innate thinking that presupposes they are stronger than a woman, appealing to their intelligence may fail. Therefore, you should approach and close from the lower position.
You can define this in any manner that you want, but essentially compare it to kicking them in the balls. Coming from the bottom could be thought of as acting with full visceral intent. This is not done in anger; it is done with well-thought out reasoning. I have found over the years that although there were times that I really wanted to physically kick someone in the balls, it would not be to my complete advantage unless the situation significantly called for it. You might use subterfuge or outright deception. Deception should not be confused with lying. We will discuss deception in depth later on.
The left side and the right side are only variations of your approach and close. Keep in mind that you want to win in a situation for the benefit of all concerned with yourself as the prime recipient of good. This can also include compromise if you are sure the other party will respect the outcome. If they aren’t sincere, then you must do whatever is necessary to win while permitting the other party to think they are maintaining their own dignity; but yours is primary. Your dignity and respectability can only be expressed if you are sincere in your own efforts. Go in for the kill, though not physically. Unless, or course…. And do yourself a favor. Get rid of the idiotic notion of a win-win situation. It doesn’t exist. Somebody has to take charge.
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